My Mind is a Blank Page

At night, when I'm in bed and trying to get to sleep, I have a million random things running through my head.  Who doesn't, right?  Yea well, my random thoughts are just that, random.   One minute, I'll think about my cat, the next second, I'll think about my book, and then think about a movie I want to see or book I want to read.  Hell, sometimes, I even think of new poems to write down.   Trust me, my thoughts get so random, it's scary! 

 

To hush these noisy thoughts and to stop my mind from racing, I imagine a blank page, the ruled kind like in notebooks. (for some reason, unlined paper just doesn't work for me) I concentrate on that blank page until my mind quiets down.  It's weird but it works for me about 80% of the time.  the other 20% percent, words start appearing on the blank page to form a poem until I have to get up and go write that crap down.  lol 

 

Last night, I started my little blank page bit, focusing on it and until I felt my mind calm down.   then a poem popped into my head. It's not the best but this what happens when my mind is left to wander on it's own.

 

My mind is a blank page,

Awaiting instruction

No longer trapped in a cage,

Free from obstruction

 

My mind is a blank page,

Ready to be used

Out there on the world's stage

Trying not to be confused.   

 

What tricks do you have to stop your mind, to quiet those thoughts that just won't go away?

My Protector Celebrity

Last night, I dreamed of a celebrity.  I'm not going to tell you which one, until the end.  You know, shock value and all.  lol 

The dream starts with me in the kitchen of a huge house, probably a mansion.  In the kitchen (black counter top, black cabinets, black appliances and it was night too) were some monitors where I could see what was happening in various areas in and out of the house.   I look at the bedroom monitor and spot the celebrity in bed, looking right at the camera, knowing I was watching.  He gives a sexy smirk and starts stripping.  Shirt goes off, the guy hooks a thumb in his pants waist and starts pulling down.  I basically run to the bedroom.  Lmao  

The scene changes and it's morning.  I walk out into the hallway and spot Pipsqueek running back and forth in the long hallway, he's just going nuts and having fun.  So I decide to join him.  The floor of the hallway was wood and polished so it was slick. I have fuzzy socks on.  You see where this is going?  Yup, I run ¾ of the way down the hallway after the cat and slide the remaining quarter way to the wall.  I run back down the other way and do the same thing.  It was a lot of fun.   My celebrity walks to the doorway and watches me.  He starts walking towards me and Pipsqueek runs past him and the guy said "Yo, Pip. Calm down, cat."   The celebrity and I hug. 

Scene changes again and I'm running for my life.  I'm terrified and running through trimmed grass and it's night.   So, all I really see is the grass and darkness around me.    I look back and whatever is there is getting closer. I don't know what it is but I have to run.  I suddenly run straight into my celebrity who hugs me tightly and tells me to calm down. 

Celebrity "What's wrong? Why are you running?"

Me through tears "It's after me!" 

Celebrity  gets all macho and steps in front of me, ready to fight but he doesn't see anything.  "There's nothing here.  See?" He says waving a hand around. "You know I'll protect you, right.  Nothing can hurt here." 

He pulls me to him, my head is on his chest, one of his hands is on the back of my head, he's just saying "shh, it's okay"  as I cry into his chest.     And then I woke up.

So, any guesses as to who my celebrity is?  Any at all?  

Okay, here are a couple of clues.    He's muscular.  He's been in many action movies and he's not governor. Lol  He's played a cop, an ex military fighter, an assassin and (I'm sure you'll know who it is after I say this)  a boxer!  

Yup, you guess it.  It was Sylvester Stallone.  Knowing that, go back and read the dream. Lol  I was kind of weirded out this morning and even said "what the Hell?!"  and you know when I say that about my dream, something is very odd. Lmao

How are you today?

Have you noticed that the question "how are you today" has turned into a nicety? It's a polite thing to ask and you always answer that you are fine, okay, all right, or some other generic "okay" response.

What would happen if people suddenly started responding honestly? It doesn't matter if you know the person or not, just imagine if you started replying with how you feel.

Person 1 "Hi, How are you today?"

Person 2 "I feel like shit, I'm depressed and I have diarhea."

Person 1 .........

Person 1 would not know how to respond to that. How much you want to bet that you'd get something like "uh huh, that's nice." LOL

I'm not saying you have to say everything that's wrong with you. If I did that, I'd be answering all day. lol I guess I'm just saying that the question is not just a nice thing to ask. If you ask the question, be prepared for the answer. You may be shocked that somebody doesn't give you the generic answer. If they do give the generic answer, it doesn't mean that they are really fine. They could be giving the short and "polite" answer.

Think about it. What effect on the world would it have if somebody gave an honest answer? What effect on that person's world could it have if you show that you not only heard them, but listened to them.

The world you change could be your own.

Case of the Energy Blahs

Hidey ho people! Today I'd like to talk about energy or lack there of. I have no energy and no will power. I know from past experience that exercising does not give you more energy for me. never has and probably never will. As far as I'm concerned, that is a myth. Caffiene does not get me wired. It barely helps to wake me up at all. I've tried energy drinks with vitamins and minerals that give you energy and they don't seem to work on me either. So, what's left for me? I try to take a multivitamin every day, although I have missed a few days. I get plenty of sleep. Yes, I am overweight but I've known a lot of overweight people that have so much energy, that it drives me nuts.

Yes, I have health issues that cause a lot of fatigue. Hypothyroidism (hashimoto's to be exact) does have lack of energy as a side effect. So tell me, what can I do to get some energy?

My apartment is a disaster because I haven't cleaned in a while. My fridge needs to be cleaned out badly and I have other things that need to get done around my place. None of it will be done. because I have no energy.

So tell me... besides the things that don't give me extra energy ( like exercise, caffiene, vitamins like B12, quality sleep etc) What can I do to give myself more energy?

Thoughts of Writing

Howdy gang! Are there any writers or editors or publishers reading this? Is anybody reading this other than a couple of close friends? lol I didn't think so. I have questions about book writing and since I don't know any writers, I'll just post them here and I'll figure out the answers somehow.

First off, I know when writing a book, it's never truly finished until it's actually published and on the book shelves. My question is, how do you know when you have reached the end of your book? There are so many books today that leave things open for a next book in case you are doing a series. Do you just go by gut feeling? I know by word count that I am not done with my book. I need to get over 70,000 words and don't want more than 90,000. Which brings me to my second set of questions.

For a first time writer that hasn't been published, what is a good word count? I have read that publishers do not want to go over 100k for a fiction book and below 40k is more like a novella instead of a novel. I have also read that some publishers want a minimum of 80k while others think that is that maximum. AND Does the word count include the chapter headings or title page and extra stuff? How in the hell is a new writer supposed to work with all the different variables? grrr

I am still considering the possibility of going with self publishing only because I don't want to deal with finding an agent. lol Yea, I'm that lazy but also if I go with self publishing, then things like word count doesn't matter at all. I try not to worry about the publishing aspect for now but it's always on my mind. I know there isn't any money in writing unless you're special like Stephen King or Dean Koontz or other great writers. I want to be published so I can go to the store, look at the book shelves and get that thrill of seeing MY book there along side of all the others. I want to see my name on a book cover.

Also there's the question of researching, more like a pet peeve. I see acknowledgements in books of fiction where the author thanks different people like "thank you to so and so for the hours of researching you did for my book". What kind of research is this? I always thought that works of fiction did not need research because it's fiction. It's fake with made up people, made up towns and places, made up species, etc. You can't research something that doesn't exist. Please don't tell me that some dork is going on a fact checking mission for a book about ghosts or vampires or other things. It just seems stupid to me.

Oh, another thing that bugs me. I have read (countless times) that to be a writer, you must set aside time every day and force yourself to write something in your book. I can't do that. You force me to do something and I will sit there and stare at the screen or go nuts or both. When I get the urge to write or I'm inspired, I just open up my Word file and start typing. I don't plan out every sentence or scene. I just let the words flow out of my fingers. Yes, I have written crap because of this but I have also written stuff that makes me say 'Wow!'. You can't force inspiration. It just has to happen. Also, there are people where setting aside time every day to write is not possible. I'm single with no kids so that helps but I do work full time and I have health issues that make me extremely fatigued some days. Forcing myself to write, even on days when I feel like crap, just isn't going to happen. Not only do I have to be inspired to write, I have to have the energy and my fingers have to be ready.

I think it's time I end this. I've rambled on a bit too much. lol If you are reading my blog, thank you! I appreciate it! And if you know a writer or publisher, feel free to share this with them. I am always open to advice but accepting it is another matter. HA! toodles